Struggles with Meditation

I’ve had an on and off again relationship with meditation. Being a lightworker, I’ve sometimes felt that I was lagging behind in my spiritual development because I hadn’t integrated it into my life.

When I was younger I had better success with it. I would have stretches lasting months, sometimes years, where I could keep a regular routine and when I saw some progress from it. I noticed my thoughts quietening a little and other benefits to my life. I would come to a point where I would get out of the habit though and then struggled to reintroduce it into my life again.

How Do You Define Meditation?

The first realisation that had an big impact on me was over a decade ago. It was the idea that my definition of meditation was rather limited. When I thought about “meditation” it conjured up Buddhist monks sitting still in front of a shrine. This is likely because I went to many Buddhist events and retreats with my family as a child and it was my first impression of meditation. It was during these occasions that I began to understand why people meditated in the first place.

At a one day event I sat at the back of a group meditation. The energy in the room and the monks themselves drew me in. I closed my eyes when the time came and I found my astral body shoot upwards above the clouds. I was with two of the Buddhist monks and a couple of others from the room. I sat there in that space in silence for somewhere between 30-60 minutes. It was so peaceful and blissful that I realised I was considering developing my own meditation practice for the first time.

At first I thought my aim should be quieting the mind straight away and just sit in the silence. This didn’t have much success. My mind would wander or dwell on things that it was trying to solve that were often associated with difficult emotions. I saw just how dysfunctional my mind was and after many “starts and stops” with meditation I began to wonder if this was for me at all. Maybe I just wasn’t a meditator ?

“When I figured out that a blank mind is not the point, that doing the inner work is more important, I also realised that meditation could be more than sitting still with yourself.” – Kyna

You can do any activity in a mindful way that reveals your inner self. It could be when you’re waiting for a bus, or doing chores that doesn’t engage the mind, so you have time to reflect. It could be whenever you express you soul like when you sing, dance, and create something new. Any time you focus on and follow that inner guide, instead of the ego, was the point. This idea was a big deal for me and opened up a lot of possibility that I hadn’t considered before.

Dealing With The Mind Rush

More recently my struggle with meditation has been because my life has been so busy. Having a lot of difficult events in my life, and being on the computer more than usual, led my mind to race a lot more – as I described in my post: How Electrostress Affects Me as an Empath. This required a different tactic. This time it WAS more about quietening the mind, to protect it from overloading by the fast pace of ascension life.

So I made a few changes to my “me time sessions” (aka “meditations”). I wanted to share these tips to help those who have felt the same about meditation and have denied themselves the benefits it can afford:


If you are so wound up that you need to give your mind a rest but your body is almost buzzing with energy, try closing your eyes and just rocking back and forth. The sensation is usually comforting, it gives your mind something to focus on that isn’t mental, and moving helps to channel the excess energy into performing a psychical motion. You can do it anywhere at any time. It’s always possible to just go to the bathroom, or some empty room, and do this for a few minutes. If you are a walker, runner, or part take in some kid of sport this might be a good time to do it too, but not everybody is able to do this on a whim when they need it most.


Another way to deal with energy overload is to use grounding visualizations to siphon off the energy you don’t need down into the Earth. There are many techniques online, but this is the one I use (which is an amalgam of a few techniques I came across):

  1. Imagine a channel of light going down your spine, through your chakras, out of your body, down into the core of the Earth.
  2. It then circles around the core, where it melds with the core, and then circles back up towards you, up your spine, and opening into the space above your head – connecting you with the cosmos.
  3. Scan your body and look for blocked or excess energy, pain, or tension and suck that into the channel going from your body down into the Earth. Imagine feeling it break up, moving through your body, down into the Earth and when it reaches the core it transforms and merges into the core’s light.
  4. Then see positive energy come up from the Earth, through the channel going up into your body, up your spine, and enters the gaps where the old extracted energy used to be.
  5. As you visualise each loop of energy imagine that each channel to/from the Earth gets wider and able to accommodate more energy flowing between you. Until the energy channels are encompassing your entire body.

Doing this on a regular basis can make a big difference to how centered and refreshed you are.

Using Low Energy

Following a period of high energy is often, at least for me, followed by a “crash”. This is a time where I need to honor the fact I have switched to a low energy state and need to rest and recuperate. I find these times are great for relaxation and meditation. Your ego mind doesn’t have enough juice to run the constant loops of thoughts it usually likes to churn out. So I find if I just focus on my breath, or my heart, in these low energy times it is enough to sustain the silence long enough to give my mind a good rest.

Binaural Beats and Isochronic Tones

I have to thank Anna Sayce for this one. I recently came across the Brainwaves website and mobile app by the Unexplainable Store. They are a series of tones, with background music and sound effects, that you can download on your phone or computer. When you listen to them they change your brainwaves to a certain frequency that is good for meditation, relaxation, sleeping, waking up, astral projection, psychic readings, automatic writing, and much much more.

Over time they train your brain to shift easier into these states of consciousness to improve your ability. You must listen to Binaural Beats with headphones, but as long as you can hear it you don’t have to with Isochronic Tones – making them good for group sessions. You may want to limit how much you use Brainwaves straight away and then build on it over time. Some of them can cause a little pressure in your head if you over do it, but this dissipates as you get use to it.

The order of brainwave frequency bands are Beta (the normal everyday thinking mind), Alpha, Theta, and finally Delta (deep sleep). I’m telling you this because you have to make sure you don’t try to go from your everyday Beta waves straight down to Delta in one go. You need to work your way down to Delta through either playing Alpha or Theta tones first. Going from Beta to Alpha/Theta is alright though, it’s just when you want to go deep into Delta that you need to work your way down the frequency bands. It is possible to create your own playlists in the Brainwaves mobile app so you can queue up a series of files to play in a specific order to make this easier.

I have found that even if my mind is racing when I try to meditate or go to bed I have a much higher success rate than I did without Brainwaves. I’ve also benefited from the other downloads I mentioned above and couldn’t live without them now! I use the astral projection Brainwave at night (when I need it) during my work week on the computer (so I can counterbalance the mind racing by leaving my body at night to give it relief). Then I let my natural tiredness play out Friday night, and then listen to my deep sleep playlist the rest of the weekend. I find that routine works well for me and aids my meditation sessions by managing my energy levels throughout the week.

There is a free trial on the mobile app, so you can give Brainwaves a try for a week and see if it works for you. Once this runs out you can either choose to pay a monthly subscription and have access to the whole library (which is HUGE!) or to pay to download individual files so you always have access to them (this is what I prefer). Considering how much this has changed my life for the better I think Brainwaves is completely worth it. 


The last couple of years I’ve come to appreciate the power of unplugging during holidays and weekends when I can. I don’t go on the computer or my mobile phone and forget about my email, social media, and to do lists. This helps to reduce the excess energy and the racing mind because it isn’t crammed with information overload or subject to the effects of electrostress. It also helps to show you that ignoring your notifications for a few days isn’t such a big deal in the scheme of things, so you can let go of the addictive side of online communication. Doing this over a longer period, such as a holiday, can make a big difference too. It gives you enough time to slow down your inner pace so you have energy and space to take in the present moment for what it is – instead of rushing around and missing it all. I recommend giving yourself an “unplugged retreat” several times a year just to take a break that will leave you more centered once you return to your work life again. You don’t have to rent a cottage in the middle of nowhere (although that wouldn’t hurt) – all you have to do is turn off your computer and phone whilst you are at home (or be strict with yourself and don’t use them if you share them with others). Giving yourself that space signals to your inner self that you are putting YOU first and not the overwhelming demands of the digital age.

Nature and Animals

Another way to unplug is to take yourself outside into nature and connect with the vast grounding and healing energy that mother Earth has to offer. Feeling the wind in your face, the earth under your feet, enjoying a beautiful sunset or landscape can be everything. It is moments like these that we often work so hard for, to pay for a holiday or to keep up payments on a summer house, and yet by consequence we get so little time to appreciate. So if you can find little ways to reconnect to nature in your everyday life then grab the chance to do so as much as you can.

If you have pets or wildlife that you can watch or interact with they can also help you to remain focused on the present moment. If my cat decides I need a break from the computer by jumping up into my laptop, whenever I can I put the computer aside, look deep into her eyes, feel the contact of her fur underneath my hands, and try to connect to her on a heart to heart basis. Just by petting her like this for a few minutes can be enough to bring relief to my mind and slow my heartbeat down. I’m not surprised by evidence that people with pets live longer and more enriched lives.

In Conclusion

Although this is not an exhaustive list it covers the main ways that I try to shrug off the fog of the everyday mind and reconnect with my higher self. The benefits for me are that I’m more focused, calmer, better able to deal with stressful situations without losing my inner cool. Sometimes when I do this I don’t always like what comes up, but working through this has always had a healing effect on me in the long run. I know now that meditation is not all about bliss and silence, so I don’t expect it or cling to it if it does show up now, and so there isn’t this disconnect between expectation and realty. By redefining my expectations of meditation I was able to open to other spiritual paths when “traditional” methods didn’t work.

I hope by implementing some of the ideas above you too can enjoy the benefits of meditation, even if your mind races from time to time like mine.

Resources and References:

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